Jessica Alba's having twins?

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Is Paula serious with this?

Singing? Mediocre.
Dancing? Sub-par.
Randy? Douche-y.
Hokey Simon and Secrest cameos? Expected.

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"It was very tastefully done. "I respect the photographer as an artist, so I look at them artistically. For him to call Lindsay 46 years later and to say can you recreate these photos is an honor. I looked at it as art, and as Lindsay doing a character. So I don't look at them like it's Playboy; she was being a character. So if you look at it that way, you can look at it as a mother." --Dina Lohan on daughter Lindsay's nudie pics

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God, I love Tim Gunn. Ok, so his solo show sucks, but he's a gem on Project Runway. Watch the clip. I mean, he has to sit next to Larry the Cable Guy. Tim's quotes and word choice (Gunnisms) are freaking hysterical:

“grandma jezebels”
“mannish in her dress” and "She's confused about what her gender is" (Both about Hillary Clinton)
"The clothes we wear send a message on how we want to be perceived"
"I can only imagine that the crocs are a metaphor" (AMEN to THAT! Crocs make me angry and I can't fathom why people wear them).

Posted by: Lawrenkm at 06:41 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Dunzo.

Posted by: Lawrenkm at 06:32 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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"When people hear what we have in the bank, it's gonna blow their minds. Madonna, eat your heart out. Britney Spears, eat your heart out. I would say we have diamond records coming – they're gonna sell 10-million plus. --Spencer Pratt on girlfriend Heidi Montag's new album

I want whatever he's on.

In case you forgot, this is the crap he's hyping:

Posted by: Lawrenkm at 06:44 AM | Comments (10) | Add Comment
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Three athletes, a magician and an Oscar-winning actress are just some of the celebrities whoÂ’ve signed on to compete on the sixth season of ABCÂ’s Dancing With the Stars.

The cast was revealed on Monday nightÂ’s Dance War finale. On Tuesday, Good Morning America will announce which pro dancers will be paired with the celebrity contestants.

HereÂ’s a rundown of whoÂ’s on board for the March 17 premiere:

Telenovela star Cristian de la Fuente

R&B singer Mario

Magician Penn Jillette

Actor Steve Guttenberg

Olympic Gold Medal Figure Skater Kristi Yamaguchi

Former tennis pro Monica Seles

NFL Player Jason Taylor

Actress Shannon Elizabeth

Radio/TV personality Adam Carolla

Actress Marissa Jaret Winokur

Oscar-winning actress Marlee Matlin

Actress Priscilla Presley

Posted by: Lawrenkm at 06:34 AM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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This seriously made my day yesterday. Watch the whole thing. Love his little mini-mullet. So hilarious. "Bet-rurr."

Posted by: Lawrenkm at 06:30 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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PETA will have a field day.

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Amy Winehouse is trying hard to stay sober, but she's still forgetful. The Grammy-winning songbird showed up at Andrew Buckler's new London boutique the other night with pal Kelly Osbourne and her new sober com panion, Blake Wood, and left a few things in the bathroom. "She left a pair of boob enhancers - like chicken cutlet things to push up your boobs - and some hair extensions in the toilet," our spy said. Later, Winehouse and Wood went to his apartment with a group of people who "were all getting drunk - except for them."

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The folks at Slate.com, who are experiencing Obasms over Barack Obama, have launched the Obamaficator - the Obama word generator that "Obamifies" words and gives definitions. Here's a sample: Obamatose: in a deep slumber, dreaming of Obama. Baracktail: a mixture with the main ingredient being Obama. Barackwurst: a short, thick, highly seasoned Obama. Barackcupied: fixed on Obama. Obambination: a union of warring parties brought together by Obama.

Posted by: Lawrenkm at 06:39 AM | Comments (10) | Add Comment
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Super Bowl hero Eli Manning still gets starstruck. When he spotted legendary Yankee Yogi Berra a few tables away at Rao's, Manning made a beeline to the Hall of Famer's table to introduce himself. The conversation soon turned to Berra's stellar career. "Eli asked Yogi how many championships he'd won," one diner told The Post's Braden Keil. Berra replied, "Ten times." Manning then mused he had just nine more to go. The two were later arm in arm singing along to "New York, New York" on the jukebox.

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Gisele Bundchen is learning that the grass isn’t always greener on the other side. Despite her title as the World’s Highest-Paid Supermodel Gisele is begging to return to roots as one of the Victoria’s Secret Angels. The lingerie giant has two words for her-”No, thanks.”

The Brazilian beauty ended her contract with Victoria’s Secret following a salary despite. Gisele has, however, “missed working for them because the money and clout were excellent.” “So she had her reps call and ask them to rehire her” for $10 million.

Victoria’s Secret passed on Gisele’s return: “They like Gisele because she’s a hard worker, but they weren’t about to go bankrupt for her.”

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Some of the Family Ties cast got together for a speaking engagement, and...well...DAMN, I feel old.

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"Do you know who I am? You are nobody! Don't make me angry!" --Adnan Ghalib to a photog who blocked him in with his car

Go wax your chin, buddy.

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Is Jenny McCarthy pregs with Jim Carrey's baby?

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In honor of the unknown Uno winning the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show (the first beagle to ever win), some of my favorite clips from the movie "Best in Show":

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Britney Spears is out, Posh Spice is in — as a lyric for the Lady in the Lake in the Broadway musical "Monty Python's Spamalot."

Asked why the lyric was changed in the song "Diva's Lament," "Spamalot" author Eric Idle said Tuesday in an e-mail: "Because we don't laugh at sad people. Mike Nichols (the show's director) requested it and he's right. We changed the lyrics in London, on tour, on Broadway and in Las Vegas. We think that it's now too sad. Britney Spears is being tortured to death and we don't want to be on that side." The changes went into the various companies last week.

What the Lady in the Lady (currently played on Broadway by Hannah Waddingham) once sang:

"I am sick of my career
Always stuck in second gear
Up to here with frustration and with fears
I've no Grammy no rewards
I've no Tony Awards
I'm constantly replaced by Britney Spears
Britney Spears!"

It's been replaced by:

"My love life is a mess
I've got constant PMS
My career is about as hot as ice
They hate me there backstage
They say I'm too old for my age
They're trying to replace me with Posh Spice
With Posh Spice!!"

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Former child star Gary Coleman – who's now 40 – married Shannon Price, whom he'd met on a movie set, last Aug. 28, her 22nd birthday, Coleman reveals to Inside Edition.

The onetime Diff'rent Strokes star also admits that this is his first-time-ever romantic relationship. "I never got the opportunity to be romantic or feel romantic with anyone," he says. "I wasn't saving myself, she just happened to be the one." The couple's nuptials happened, "on a mountaintop," according to Coleman. "Nobody was around but the minister, preacher, the videographers, the photographer, the helicopter pilot and us. That was all that was there. There was nobody else.”

Not that the newlyweds don't have their differences. "We may go a week and not speak to each other," he says, while she claims, "He lets his anger conquer him sometimes. Â… He throws things around, and sometimes he throws it in my direction." She adds, "I don't like the violence."

Then there is the fact that he stands 4'8", while she is more than 5'7". But, says the bride: "He was 10 feet tall to me, because he was sweet and I really liked his personality." As for the 18 years between them, "I don't have issues with age, I have issues with intelligence," says Coleman. "She's more intelligent than I am, and that's what matters to me."

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"I don't think she should have won. I think it sends a bad message to our young people who are trying to get into this business, the ones who are trying to do it right and really trying to keep themselves together. We have to stop rewarding bad behavior. I'm sorry. I think the girl is talented, gifted, but it's not right for her to be able to have her cake and eat it too. She needs to get herself together." --Natalie Cole on Amy Winehouse

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